A Sister's Reflections - continued
Bebe was the only one who could make me laugh when I was in the middle of a really good sulk. Whenever I felt unreasonably sorry for myself, it only took her saying, "Poor baby! There, there, there " to start me climbing out of my ugly mood. She was truly my rock.

When I returned to Ohio 16 years ago, Bebe and Sam once again opened the door to me, took me into their home, and supported me in many ways through two years at Denison while I finished my degree. Denison provided tuition through scholarships. Bebe and Sam provided a rent-free room while I was in school and for several months after graduation - not to mention the occasional bags of emergency groceries and regular outings for special meals! They shared the experience with me. No parents could have been prouder or more excited when my Phi Beta Kappa nomination arrived. No sister and brother (or mother and father) could have taken more pride or genuine pleasure in my achievements.

The hardest and most important lesson I have ever had to learn was to trustingly accept the great gifts Bebe and Sam gave me - love, pride in me, the opportunity to start over after a divorce. They forced me to accept graciously all that they offered, and to trust the love that motivated the giving. In my 40s, I learned for the first time to trust not just their love, but that of all my family.

In recent years, I became aware that our early 'psychic' bond seemed to have been misplaced. But it returned full force shortly before Bebe died.

She hated the nursing home they moved her to after her last hospitalization and begged us to get her out of there. Gail was visiting and helped me when I left work in a panic at 10:00 on Monday morning and rushed home to research and locate a nursing facility where Bebe would be comfortable and would feel safe. I felt quite desperate to get Bebe moved.

Gail had to leave Monday afternoon, but first made phone calls to get information and set up appointments. Tuesday morning, March 13, I was up early and went to Newark to inspect two facilities.

Sue, evidently sharing my sense of urgency, was sent home from work by loving friends who sensed her despair. Together, we got Bebe moved, by Tuesday afternoon, to a lovely and loving place in Newark, Ohio.

Wednesday, a call to the nursing station disclosed that she had taken a significant turn for the worse. And I knew that finally, Bebe felt safe to let go. She had told Gail a week or so earlier that she was ready to die. I believe she fought with all her strength to hang on until we could - in her words - get her out of that place! When she was finally in comfortable surroundings with tender, caring professionals, she relaxed. I told Gail two days before Bebe's death that she was getting ready to leave us, that she felt safe enough to let go.

I humbly and sincerely thank God that we received the guidance and help we needed to find a wonderful place and move Bebe there 'just in the nick of time'. She finally was able to stop fighting, and we can all rest easier knowing her last few days were filled with love and caring.

Friday evening, I received the call from the hospice nurse, who told me that Bebe had died. And she shared with me my sister's last words: Bebe opened her eyes, smiled at the nurse, and said "I've just seen a glimpse of heaven."

If I had a year to write this, I could not find the words to tell you how much I will miss my sister. She was my hero and my role model for so much of my young life. And my best and most trusted friend, always.

Adieu, Adieu, ma jolie soeur,
Je t'aime beaucoup... et pour toujours...

Sunny (left) & Bebe Carnival Celebration, June 1992
Delivered at Bebe's Memorial Service March 21, 2001 5:00 P.M. Madison Christian Church Groveport, Ohio